This resonates so much. I felt so lost after my divorce, and it wasn’t just because I lost my husband, I lost my identity, lifestyle, and all our hopes and dreams shattered. It helped me grow more independent, and made me a better therapist too!
thank you so so much for articulating all of this so clearly. i truly appreciate how you are actively dismantling unhealthy discourses out here in the world!!!this was so healing to read!!! ❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹💙💙💙🌊🌊🌊
Hello, Good Doctor. I haven’t given much thought to the effects of a breakup since I’ve been in an exclusive relationship with my wife for forty-three years. At times when I have thought about it, perhaps when hearing of the separation or divorce of an acquaintance or a celebrity power couple, I’ve considered it mostly in terms of feelings of rejection and a loss of self esteem. This essay shows how complicated the end of a relationship can actually be, and how much more is lost in the circumstances. Concepts like the Michelangelo Principle and the Self Expansion Theory have never occurred to me because of the almost casual way that my wife and I have entered into and sustained our relationship. I have a wonderful wife, and I feel that I’m swimming in an embarrassment of riches in the way that she is so easygoing and so very good to me. Your post makes me feel very sad for people who haven’t had things come so easily for them in their love lives. I always look forward to your essays and I never fail to learn from them and to begin to see everyday life in new ways. Thank you for the effort, thought and time you put into sharing, teaching and opening up my eyes about the things of which I’ve given little or no attention to over the years. As frequently happens, this essay is liked, restacked and highly recommended!
We could also view this through the lenses of child development, attachment theory, grief and loss. So many ways to approach this issue!
Definitely. Attachment theory provides the fundamentals. Grief models are equally connected.
This resonates so much. I felt so lost after my divorce, and it wasn’t just because I lost my husband, I lost my identity, lifestyle, and all our hopes and dreams shattered. It helped me grow more independent, and made me a better therapist too!
Thanks for sharing this, Kate. It’s definitely not an easy process, but many people manage to grow through it like you said.
thank you so so much for articulating all of this so clearly. i truly appreciate how you are actively dismantling unhealthy discourses out here in the world!!!this was so healing to read!!! ❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹💙💙💙🌊🌊🌊
Hello, Good Doctor. I haven’t given much thought to the effects of a breakup since I’ve been in an exclusive relationship with my wife for forty-three years. At times when I have thought about it, perhaps when hearing of the separation or divorce of an acquaintance or a celebrity power couple, I’ve considered it mostly in terms of feelings of rejection and a loss of self esteem. This essay shows how complicated the end of a relationship can actually be, and how much more is lost in the circumstances. Concepts like the Michelangelo Principle and the Self Expansion Theory have never occurred to me because of the almost casual way that my wife and I have entered into and sustained our relationship. I have a wonderful wife, and I feel that I’m swimming in an embarrassment of riches in the way that she is so easygoing and so very good to me. Your post makes me feel very sad for people who haven’t had things come so easily for them in their love lives. I always look forward to your essays and I never fail to learn from them and to begin to see everyday life in new ways. Thank you for the effort, thought and time you put into sharing, teaching and opening up my eyes about the things of which I’ve given little or no attention to over the years. As frequently happens, this essay is liked, restacked and highly recommended!
I like the way you always appreciate your wife and your relationship with her. Very admirable.